Wednesday, August 15, 2007

I Have a Slightly Better IDEA...







On Monday, August 13th, a Roman Catholic Bishop (Bishop Tiny Muskens, pictured left) in the Netherlands proposed that people of all faiths, especially Christians and Jews, refer to God as Allah to foster a better interfaith understanding. In the process he stoked an already heated debate on religious tolerance in a country with one million Muslims.

Bishop Muskens, from the southern diocese of Breda, told Dutch television on Monday that God did not mind what he was named and that in Indonesia, where Muskens spent eight years, priests used the word "Allah" while celebrating Mass.

Hmmmmm, OK, good one, but as usual, I have a slightly better idea.

(What, are you surprised by that? It’s what I do.)

I’d prefer to foster a better cultural understanding by having Christians and Jews, as well as Buddhists, agnostics, atheists, etc., adopt the Muslim habit of simply slaughtering both those who are different and those they disagree with.

As a for instance, say a Muslim complains about “racial profiling,” or some other such nonsense, well, in that case, we simply form a mob, drag him/her out into the middle of a very public place (a crowded park or a busy thoroughfare) and saw off their head in a very public spectacle, as an example to other Muslims not to rile up the local savages.

We could then move onto...oh, I don’t know, say instead of stoning adulterous women (we tend to like adulterous women in the West...we like’m a lot), maybe we'd stone women who wear the hijab to death.

See?

While I’m pretty damn sure that calling God, or Jesus, "Allah" wouldn’t mean shit to your average Muslime, stoning his hijab wearing wife or daughter to death certainly may grab his attention, at least in a kind of “Holy SHIITE, look what these crazy Christian muthafuckas is up to now,” kind of way.

Seriously, the problem with Bishop Muskens’ idea is that it’s timid and weak, besides, it literally wreaks of rancid appeasement.

Mine, on the other hand, says “Hello Muslim son-of-bitch-bastard, and how are you today? I hope you are well and sufficiently fattened Muslim, because today I’m going to slaughter you and feed your lifeless carcass to my hungry dogs.”

Now you tell me, which one fosters better interfaith, inter-cultural understanding?

Well, I know I’m biased in all this, but I truly believe that mine does.

WHY?

HOW?

Easy, see mine actually puts Westerners in the mindset of a rabid Muslim. And what could possibly generate more inter-faith, inter-cultural understanding than that?!

Think about it!

No, really, just think about it...and you’ll see that I’m right about this.

Not only that, but the Muslims, who tend to view kindness as weakness and any kind of appeasement as an even more disgusting form of weakness, would come away from the ordeal I set out with a new found respect/fear of the Westerner.

It’s a God-damned WIN-WIN!!!

Ooooops! Sorry bout the blasphemin’ Bishop.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Aaah, JMK!

Alas, you and I are among the few that think along the same lines on this.

Lemme try a simpler, less oppresive solution - one which I am sure you mulled upon when reading this tripe:

Let's propose that all the muslims refer to Allah as God!

We accomplish the same effect only with a different unifying word!

Why not propose this?

For the same reasons that people sought to mollify Hitler is why.

It won't work.

It can't work.

It never has worked.

You are better than I at historical quotes, JMK. Who said, in essence:

'Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it."?

JMK said...

"Who said, in essence:

'Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it."? (Mal)



I think it was Santayana, Mal.

I AGREE with your view....I probably should've posted a "sarcasm alert" on this one, but after reading the poor misguided views of Bishp Musken, I just threw the words down to the page.

The naive are the weak who are blithely unaware of their weaknesses.

Kindness IS "weakness," UNLESS it's done as a mercy, backed up by strength, as one man helping another to his fight after beating him in a fight.

Kindness without any context DOES indeed wreak of weakness, especially to those already disposed to hate you.

You understand....far too many don't.

Mick Brady said...

JMK, I fully understand the liberating feeling of just throwing down those words on the page without even going back and editing them. Every now and then, things are so exasperating that they virtually pour out onto the page. In addition, I agree fully with your point; in fact I would go so far as to apply the word 'pandering' to the good Bishop's idea.

It is no coincidence that these words were uttered by a priest in the Netherlands, where Theo Van Gogh lay slaughtered on a street, a note pinned to his chest with a dagger by his Islamic assassin; a note in which he threatened his collaborator with the same fate, Ayaan Hirsi Ali. She was eventually driven out of Parliament by her cowardly colleagues and now lives in the U.S., under heavy security.

Perhaps it's time to go back and re-read the late Oriana Fallaci's fiery and prophetic books, The Force of Reason and The Rage and the Pride, in order to understand what's at work here. Both books address the question of whether Islam can be assimilated into Western, especially European, culture, and her conclusion is a resounding NO!, for which she was tried in absentia in an Italian court and convicted. She died last year in New York, unable to return to her native country.

Shout it from the rooftops if you must. If you're lucky, someone besides you and I and Mal might listen.

JMK said...

"Perhaps it's time to go back and re-read the late Oriana Fallaci's fiery and prophetic books, The Force of Reason and The Rage and the Pride, in order to understand what's at work here. Both books address the question of whether Islam can be assimilated into Western, especially European, culture, and her conclusion is a resounding NO!..." (Mick)


Ironically enough, I HAVE Fallaci's books (at least those two) Mick, and you're right, she is prophetic and far ahead of her time, or at least, perhaps sadlder still, "out of step with her times."

Bishop Muskens is typical of those naive enough to prattle on in favor of, "peace at all costs," as they, like himself, always espouse accepting "peace" in the form of appeasement and capitulation.

Bishop Muskens suggesting Dutch Christians and Jews begin calling god, "Allah," in the wake of the Van Gogh murder, the Danish cartoon controversy, etc., is nothing less than espousing serville dhimmitude, with a rejoinder of, "It's not that bad."

Slavery ALWAYS guaranteees peace, so that always relagates "peace" to a second-hand, second-class status.

Peace can be had cheap, peace can be had through surrender and slavery.

Liberty often requires bloodshed, freedom often requires bloodshed, Capitalism (economic liberty) often requires bloodshed, independence often requires bloodshed...hopefully MORE of theirs and LESS of ours.

The ONLY peace decent people ever want is the peace garnered "through superior fire power."

In the 20th Century Socialism swept the globe as a worldwide movement, with Germany's National Socialism and the USSR's Soviet Socialism being the most aggressive.

Those who loved individualism (individual liberty) and freedom (especially economic freedom) fought the "Red Menace," those in the West who reviled freedom, Capitalism and individualism sought to undermine that fight every step of the way.

Today there are remnants of the defeated and disheartened Left, those who fought against the West, especially AGAINST America in its righteous fight against global socialism, who now seek to undermine the current WoT every step of the way.

The Western Left were enemies throughout the fight against global socialism, and they remain enemies (perhaps even more vehement ones) today.

YES< traditional Islam IS incompatible with the West, but so is radical American Left.

There was NEVER a pro-American socialist, and there's NEVER been, nor will be, a pro-American jihadist, or WoT-opponent.

Anonymous said...

Was this MF serious? Allah? I think maybe Juan. No, better, Bubba. Wait, I've got it, I really do:

Leave me the F alone to call whatever deity I want to refer to whatever in the F I want to! I don't give a F what the Moors think! I don't give a F if they are happy(not actively wish unhappiness upon them).

With perhaps less venom I'll advance another notion: Which particular hater of meaningful language coined the utterly meaningless phrase "interfaith understanding?" Our language gets more debased every day by meaningless words, phrases, similes, metaphors, etc. Say what you mean: you fear these Moors and want to kiss their ass. Screw that! They want to party? Let them fear us!They wanna play nice? Condemn the evil murderers amongst themselves! How's that for "interfaith understanding?"

JMK said...

I think this Bishop means well Gerry, but he's tremendously naive.

The Muslim world has routinely looked on kindness as capitulation and outreach as weakness.

At this point, at least, it seems that Islamic culture, as it's now constituted, is innately incompatible with the West.

Western tradition is based on tolerance and inclusion, while Islamic culture is innately intolerant, treats "others" as "dhimmis" (3rd class citizens) and reviles Western mores as "decadent."

Oh yeah, and lately they seem intent on killing as many of Westerners as possible, so I think "incompatible" is the nicest way to put that.

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